[And Tifa will only be a few minutes later than Mitsuru thanks to her speedy jogging. She might have been late otherwise, so when she arrives, she looks a touch winded. Not too much that she can't speak or walk, but her cheeks are definitely a little red from it. It's a long way from the inn, but it's a good workout at least.
When she sees Mitsuru, she wanders across the café to her.]
[ When Tifa enters, she'll find Mitsuru sitting in one of the booths towards the back of the cafe with two cups of tea - still faintly steaming - on the table in front of her. She rises to her feet as Tifa walks up, smoothing a few imaginary wrinkles out of her shirt. ]
No, not at all.
[ Mitsuru attempts a friendly smile, but it isn't entirely convincing. There's something brittle about it, around the edges. ]
I hope that you didn't rush over on my account, though.
[ Even though she's very grateful for Tifa's presence at the same time. ]
[Tifa's head cants to the side, seeing a smile she knows too well. It's the same sort of smile she wears sometimes, and while there's worry wrinkling her brows, she motions for Mitsuru to sit along with her.]
Nope. Well, I didn't want to be too late, but I just grabbed at the opportunity to go for a run.
[The cup of tea that's already waiting for her is more than welcome, its sweet aroma wafting into her head already, and she sighs contentedly before peering across at her friend. She'd make some more small-talk before diving right in, but the way that she's holding herself... She wouldn't be able to relax herself without knowing what was going on, so she presses gently.]
[Tifa can sympathize with that, and it shows across her expression. Although hers isn't so much a falling out as much as it is just not being able to stop thinking about the fact that her and her dear friend haven't spoken since she got here. That is neither here nor there, but it does bring a dose of her own sadness into her frown.
She raises her tea to her lips, puffing some air on it, before she tries a sip. Still too hot.]
That's no good... You wanna talk about it?
["What happened" doesn't feel like the right kind of question here. If Mitsuru wants to talk about it, then she's here to listen, but she isn't going to pry and poke for more information than she's ready to share.]
[But Tifa nods in understanding. She can think of a few times herself that she's been through that sort of thing, and all she'd wanted was to run away from it. It never turned out well in her favour, but sometimes, that's the easiest thing to do until she's ready to talk about it. So, she won't push, but her expression says enough—that she's willing to bend an ear if Mitsuru ever did need to, because that goes without saying.]
We can talk about something else.
[She's trying to think of what that "something else" is that the two of them can relate to, and she has some ideas—mainly just talking about what's new in her life, and hearing about what else is new in Mitsuru's, but she's giving the other girl the chance to pursue whichever route she decides to take.]
I don't intend to, it's just ... proving difficult to navigate.
[ Mitsuru picks up her cup of tea, letting some of its warmth seep into her fingers. ]
She and I have gone through a great deal together, but its become clear that there things at play within her life that I was completely unaware of. I ...
[ She sighs, abandoning her usual prim posture and allowing her shoulders to sag a little. ]
I'm afraid that I might cause her further pain. That I might say or do something that opens up an old wound that I was completely oblivious to, and drive her away competely.
[There's a flicker of sadness in Tifa's eyes, and she allows her gaze to fall to her own tea. This is a problem that she can certainly relate to, and while she hasn't figured out how to navigate hers, she isn't about to turn Mitsuru away from trying to help figure her own out.
She's about to get very hypocritical, but she tries not to hang onto that realization for long.]
Have you told her any of that? What you just told me...?
[Tifa has no idea what could be going on between Mitsuru and this friend of hers, or the nature of their relationship, and won't pry without her sharing the information first, but this seemed like a good place to start.]
She has a tendency to withdraw in situations like this, and I ... I've been to afraid of making things worse.
[ Finally, she takes a sip of her tea. As she sets the cup back down again, it occurs to her that she's done this before ... complained about her problems instead of having the courage or conviction to face them. It had been under completely different circumstances, but the behavior had been the same.
[ She'd thought she'd grown past that ... she hoped that she had, at least. Yet here she is, stumbling at the first true test of her resolve.
[ A small huff of mirthless laughter escapes her. ]
How foolish of me ...
[ Of course, acknowledging that didn't make the fear suddenly dissipate. It just left her frustrated with her own inaction, too. ]
If she was inclined to talk, I'd listen without hesitation.
[ She wishes she'd been ready to do so then. All of this might have been avoided. ]
I've already mentioned her tendency to withdraw, but my friend also ... she doesn't discuss her problems easily. She'd rather suffer in silence than share that pain with others ... I think she does it because she's afraid that she'll drive people away by doing so.
[This is all hitting too close to home for Tifa, and she sips on her tea in silence, still listening carefully to what Mitsuru has to say. She can think of too many people, herself included, that do the very thing that Mitsuru's friend is doing, and it's true—it's difficult to maneuver how to deal with that kind of person.
Setting her cup down, she smiles across at Mitsuru. Is she looking for advice, or just an ear to bend?
...
She doesn't want to overstep, so she gives it a moment before she gives her two cents again.]
There any way you can think of to show she won't drive you away?
[Clearly, Mitsuru cares deeply about this friendship and wants to make it work. She doesn't seem like the type of person who would be driven away by something like someone else's problems, and that's just the impression she's gotten from this now—wanting to fix things. It's just a matter of finding the how.]
I was hoping some answer would come to me if I gave it enough time, but ...
[ But nothing's come. Just the guilt and self-loathing for causing a friend who's already suffered their fair share a little more pain, and the fear that she's done irreparable harm. ]
I don't have many people that I consider to be true friends, Tifa ... for most of my life, I had none.
[ Her eyes fall towards the table again. ]
I don't want to lose someone I love ... not again.
[ Especially not when she's already been gifted with a second chance that most people never get. ]
The thought of talking this through is terrifying, but if I don't want to lose her, I don't know that I have another choice ...
[She wishes she could say something more reassuring than what she's about to say, but Mitsuru is right.]
If you do want to make it work, I think talking it through's the best thing for both of you.
[There's a sort of heaviness to her voice—guilt, perhaps?—and she swallows past it, sipping on her tea in the hopes of drowning it out. There's a pause before Tifa reaches across the table and wraps her fingers around Mitsuru's arm.]
[ The touch pulls Mitsuru out of her reverie. Her eyes shift from the table to Tifa's hand on her arm, and then to Tifa herself. ]
How can you be sure ...?
[ She'd heard the something underpinning Tifa's words a moment before, but she couldn't tell what it was - whether it was guilt, or concern, or uncertainty, or something else entirely.
[ Mitsuru didn't doubt that Tifa meant what she said, though, she just ...
[ She's searching for any sort of assurance she can find. Something to hold on to so she can steady herself and start to move past this fear that's been paralyzing her. ]
[Tifa can tell that she's searching for something, and she wishes she could give her more than just simple reassurance. She wishes she could prove it somehow, but with how delicate she's being about pulling information from Mitsuru to get a feel for the situation, she can't say she has much to go on besides her own experiences, and her faith in other people. She hopes that it will at least be enough.]
If both people care enough about each other, then they'll find a way to work through it, no matter what. Sounds to me like that's the case for you.
[ And, for a few seconds, all Mitsuru does is look at Tifa. Silently considering her words until, finally, she lets out a long slow exhale. ]
No. No, I won't.
[ That may be a threadbare silver lining on its own, but the first half of Tifa's statement was exactly the sort of reassurance that she needed. It didn't silence her guilt and anxiety entirely, but it gave her something to hold on to ... something she could stand behind in the face of those negative feelings, and she's beyond grateful for that.
[ Mitsuru lifts a hand and gently places it over Tifa's -- the hand that Tifa had left on her arm. ]
[It isn't much in the way of words or encouragement, but seeing Mitsuru let out that breath tells her that she's done something right. It's something that everyone needs to hear sometimes, even her, so she's glad that she could at least help with that.
Tilting her head, she lets her smile warm, and her fingers give a gentle squeeze at Mitsuru's arm.]
Of course. I hope you two can work things out.
[She knows they will.]
And let me know how it all goes, okay? Maybe we can come back for another cup.
[And have it be under better circumstances, when they're both much happier!]
[Tifa beams across the table at her, the soft amusement in her voice betraying her words. If she is, then that'll just mean that she was able to talk to her friend, right? Of course she means it in the kindest way possible.
Granted, she still has almost a full cup of tea left, so she sips it before it gets cold, but as she sets her cup down again, she lets her gaze drop to the ripples inside it.]
If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always call me, alright?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
text; un: lockhart
[She didn't have a whole lot going on, but she would have dropped everything either way.]
Where are you? I can come meet you.
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[It's one of her favourite spots to go when she needs to get out, and find a quiet place to think, so it seems fitting.]
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[And Tifa will only be a few minutes later than Mitsuru thanks to her speedy jogging. She might have been late otherwise, so when she arrives, she looks a touch winded. Not too much that she can't speak or walk, but her cheeks are definitely a little red from it. It's a long way from the inn, but it's a good workout at least.
When she sees Mitsuru, she wanders across the café to her.]
Sorry. Did I keep you waiting long?
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No, not at all.
[ Mitsuru attempts a friendly smile, but it isn't entirely convincing. There's something brittle about it, around the edges. ]
I hope that you didn't rush over on my account, though.
[ Even though she's very grateful for Tifa's presence at the same time. ]
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Nope. Well, I didn't want to be too late, but I just grabbed at the opportunity to go for a run.
[The cup of tea that's already waiting for her is more than welcome, its sweet aroma wafting into her head already, and she sighs contentedly before peering across at her friend. She'd make some more small-talk before diving right in, but the way that she's holding herself... She wouldn't be able to relax herself without knowing what was going on, so she presses gently.]
So, is everything okay?
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[ Mitsuru sighs, shaking her head as she takes her seat opposite Tifa. ]
I recently had a ... a falling out with a very dear friend, and its all that I can think about.
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She raises her tea to her lips, puffing some air on it, before she tries a sip. Still too hot.]
That's no good... You wanna talk about it?
["What happened" doesn't feel like the right kind of question here. If Mitsuru wants to talk about it, then she's here to listen, but she isn't going to pry and poke for more information than she's ready to share.]
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Speaking perfectly honestly, I'm not sure ...
[ Her eyes fall towards the table, settling on the teacup in front of her as though she might find some answer in its contents. ]
I want to discuss it, yes, but another part of me wants some kind of escape ... it's been all I can think about, of late.
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[But Tifa nods in understanding. She can think of a few times herself that she's been through that sort of thing, and all she'd wanted was to run away from it. It never turned out well in her favour, but sometimes, that's the easiest thing to do until she's ready to talk about it. So, she won't push, but her expression says enough—that she's willing to bend an ear if Mitsuru ever did need to, because that goes without saying.]
We can talk about something else.
[She's trying to think of what that "something else" is that the two of them can relate to, and she has some ideas—mainly just talking about what's new in her life, and hearing about what else is new in Mitsuru's, but she's giving the other girl the chance to pursue whichever route she decides to take.]
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[ Mitsuru picks up her cup of tea, letting some of its warmth seep into her fingers. ]
She and I have gone through a great deal together, but its become clear that there things at play within her life that I was completely unaware of. I ...
[ She sighs, abandoning her usual prim posture and allowing her shoulders to sag a little. ]
I'm afraid that I might cause her further pain. That I might say or do something that opens up an old wound that I was completely oblivious to, and drive her away competely.
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She's about to get very hypocritical, but she tries not to hang onto that realization for long.]
Have you told her any of that? What you just told me...?
[Tifa has no idea what could be going on between Mitsuru and this friend of hers, or the nature of their relationship, and won't pry without her sharing the information first, but this seemed like a good place to start.]
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[ Mitsuru shakes her head. ]
She has a tendency to withdraw in situations like this, and I ... I've been to afraid of making things worse.
[ Finally, she takes a sip of her tea. As she sets the cup back down again, it occurs to her that she's done this before ... complained about her problems instead of having the courage or conviction to face them. It had been under completely different circumstances, but the behavior had been the same.
[ She'd thought she'd grown past that ... she hoped that she had, at least. Yet here she is, stumbling at the first true test of her resolve.
[ A small huff of mirthless laughter escapes her. ]
How foolish of me ...
[ Of course, acknowledging that didn't make the fear suddenly dissipate. It just left her frustrated with her own inaction, too. ]
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No, it's not.
[Far from it. It would be admitting to herself that her own actions are foolish... but neither of them is for wanting to be careful.]
Sometimes you just have to... feel it out first. Find your footing so you don't stumble, you know?
[Nodding, Tifa sits back and takes her first sip of her tea, her nose wrinkling at how hot it still is, but downing it nonetheless.]
You could try hearing her out instead, if that makes it easier.
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[ She wishes she'd been ready to do so then. All of this might have been avoided. ]
I've already mentioned her tendency to withdraw, but my friend also ... she doesn't discuss her problems easily. She'd rather suffer in silence than share that pain with others ... I think she does it because she's afraid that she'll drive people away by doing so.
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Setting her cup down, she smiles across at Mitsuru. Is she looking for advice, or just an ear to bend?
...
She doesn't want to overstep, so she gives it a moment before she gives her two cents again.]
There any way you can think of to show she won't drive you away?
[Clearly, Mitsuru cares deeply about this friendship and wants to make it work. She doesn't seem like the type of person who would be driven away by something like someone else's problems, and that's just the impression she's gotten from this now—wanting to fix things. It's just a matter of finding the how.]
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[ But nothing's come. Just the guilt and self-loathing for causing a friend who's already suffered their fair share a little more pain, and the fear that she's done irreparable harm. ]
I don't have many people that I consider to be true friends, Tifa ... for most of my life, I had none.
[ Her eyes fall towards the table again. ]
I don't want to lose someone I love ... not again.
[ Especially not when she's already been gifted with a second chance that most people never get. ]
The thought of talking this through is terrifying, but if I don't want to lose her, I don't know that I have another choice ...
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[She wishes she could say something more reassuring than what she's about to say, but Mitsuru is right.]
If you do want to make it work, I think talking it through's the best thing for both of you.
[There's a sort of heaviness to her voice—guilt, perhaps?—and she swallows past it, sipping on her tea in the hopes of drowning it out. There's a pause before Tifa reaches across the table and wraps her fingers around Mitsuru's arm.]
I promise you won't lose anyone, though.
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How can you be sure ...?
[ She'd heard the something underpinning Tifa's words a moment before, but she couldn't tell what it was - whether it was guilt, or concern, or uncertainty, or something else entirely.
[ Mitsuru didn't doubt that Tifa meant what she said, though, she just ...
[ She's searching for any sort of assurance she can find. Something to hold on to so she can steady herself and start to move past this fear that's been paralyzing her. ]
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If both people care enough about each other, then they'll find a way to work through it, no matter what. Sounds to me like that's the case for you.
[As for her friend...]
Won't know until you try, yeah?
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No. No, I won't.
[ That may be a threadbare silver lining on its own, but the first half of Tifa's statement was exactly the sort of reassurance that she needed. It didn't silence her guilt and anxiety entirely, but it gave her something to hold on to ... something she could stand behind in the face of those negative feelings, and she's beyond grateful for that.
[ Mitsuru lifts a hand and gently places it over Tifa's -- the hand that Tifa had left on her arm. ]
Thank you, Tifa.
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Tilting her head, she lets her smile warm, and her fingers give a gentle squeeze at Mitsuru's arm.]
Of course. I hope you two can work things out.
[She knows they will.]
And let me know how it all goes, okay? Maybe we can come back for another cup.
[And have it be under better circumstances, when they're both much happier!]
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[ Mitsuru nods, a small huff of laughter escaping. ]
I'll try to be better company the next time around.
[ Don't worry, though. Self-effacing as that might sound, it's good-natured -- a joke, rather than an apology for her behavior. ]
i think we can probably wrap this! 💕
[Tifa beams across the table at her, the soft amusement in her voice betraying her words. If she is, then that'll just mean that she was able to talk to her friend, right? Of course she means it in the kindest way possible.
Granted, she still has almost a full cup of tea left, so she sips it before it gets cold, but as she sets her cup down again, she lets her gaze drop to the ripples inside it.]
If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always call me, alright?
Sorry for how delayed this final tag is, but yeah, I think that's a wrap.